Sometimes it's hard to focus - there are so many things to be done! - and it may start to feel overwhelming. We start to wonder if we're just not cut out for it (whatever it may be).

Maybe I'm just not meant to be a ...

[su_list icon="icon: coffee" icon_color="#ff1493"]

• Homeschooler


• Work-at-Home Mom


• Work-Away-From-Home Mom


• Proverbs 31 Woman


• Stock Investor


• (Add Your Other Hats Here)

[/su_list]

Instead of beating ourselves up for not being the perfect everything we should slow down and breathe. Not even our favorite all-in-one, multifunction printer/scanner/fax/copier machines can do EVERY task at once!

Look at everything that needs to be done. Pick a task to start with and go from there.

[signoff]

Unknown

Jeez. I really hate being a whineypants. It makes me mad at myself. Yet, what is a personal blog for if I can't vent now and then, right?

So, yeah, here goes:

I'm a weepy, sad mess and it's all my fault.

It's my fault because I'm not changing what I should because I don't want to accept things aren't working out the way I wanted. I don't want to accept there is no happily-ever-after. I don't want to accept that I can't do all the things I used to, the way I used to, as fast as I used to. I have a baby. Things are different. My c-sectioned body is different.

Mommy hormones are making me emotional but I work from home so I'm here a lot. A lot of people think it means I don't do anything so I should have the house immaculate, all meals made from scratch, the kids tended to perfectly, and should be able to graciously accept visitors at any hour of the day because, you know, I'm bored.

Oh yes, I'm also a go-to babysitter for emergencies and sick children because - again - I "do nothing" at home.

Really, now. Imagine doing your job while your kids make noise, people drop by, the laundry is going, the dinner is cooking, the house needs cleaning, and you haven't even changed out of your jammies yet so you don't even feel prepared to face the world at all!

My God. If the people ridiculing me say they see me online "all the time", doesn't that mean THEY are online "all the time" too? So exactly how much "work" are they getting done, hmmm?

RAWR. It just gets my goat!

As for the relationship, oh my God. Do.Not.Even.Get.Me.Started. I knew marriage wasn't going to be a walk in the park but this is absofreakin ridiculous!

God, spouse, kids, family, friends. That was my thinking. What I got is ex-wife, stepkids, husband, husband's friends, husband's family, maybe God, maybe me, maybe the baby, and eventually maybe my son, CJ.

Not acceptable. Not acceptable at all. It's not what I signed up for. Not what I was promised.

Then I stop to think, we're all imperfect creatures, he says we'll fix things, I say okay because damn it, we're married already and have a baby. Like a damn idiot.

So I'm changing things. Slowly but surely. Slowly because my mind and my soul are having a hard time accepting that I was stupid. I was lied to. I was used. By someone I grew up with. Someone who knows my story and my family's history.

The lies he's told about me. The way his peeps mock me. Jerks! It's on! It's time to put on the Big Girl Panties and bust out the can of whoopass.

Step 1: Start making more money. As a Virtual Assistant, as a blogger, as a writer, as whatever. Independence comes to those who can support themselves and their children.

Step 2: Implement a Life Plan. It doesn't matter if I don't hit all the goals or the goals change. It matters that I start taking the steps to be happy. For myself. For my kids.

Why should my children grow up thinking they have to settle for anything less than true happiness, peace, joy, love, and a good life with a good, honest spouse?

To paraphrase Jim Carrey in The Mask: Looks like Momma's gotta go kick some ass!

Wishing you much peace, happiness, and success,

Unknown

[su_quote cite="Psalm 35:11 (King James Bible)"]False witnesses did rise up; they laid to my charge things that I knew not.[/su_quote]

It hurts when someone continually casts you as the enemy, the villain in their life story, even though you have done nothing to them. No matter how far out of your way you go to bless them, to be there for them, they are making a repeated choice to believe negative things about you or want to push you out of their life.

You may be left in confusion, wondering - perhaps even flat out asking - why? Why do you treat me this way?

Maybe something about you may be rubbing them the wrong way or it could have nothing to do with you at all. Perhaps your presence requires them to act in a manner far different than they'd prefer. In other words, they were not being honest with you and not being themselves. Now they are trapped in a role they wear like a shrunken pair of wool pants.

We will not always get along with those around us but you may want to pray and seriously reconsider any relationship that refuses to acknowledge and accept the good in you. In the end, it doesn't matter why. What matters is that you are not being (and may not ever be) treated as the blessing you are.

[signoff]

Unknown

It's been a whirlwind year and a half but I'm back! From single mom to a 12 year old to married, +2 kids (14 and 10), and an almost miraculous conception. My baby girl is 4 months old now and I'm jumping back in to the mix.

Let's connect (or reconnect!) if we haven't already. :)

Penny's Empowerment Club | Empowering The Perfectly Imperfect Proverbs 31 Woman
http://pennysempowermentclub.com
http://facebook.com/PennysEmpowermentClub
http://twitter.com/PennyFull

CJ's Kids Club | Promoting Self-Confidence And Natural Learning Fun
http://cjskidsclub.com
http://facebook.com/CJsKidsClub
http://twitter.com/CJsKidsClub

Wishing you much peace, happiness, and success,

Pearl 'Penny' Lane-Soliz

Independent ItWorks Distributor

Anonymous

Many relationships run into trouble when they fail to honestly discuss and plan for the needs of a home business.

The partner who works outside the home may come home feeling tired and ready to rest - after all, they did their work for the day - but looks around and sees chaos. Children needing/wanting attention, housework left undone here and there, and their mate chattering about the joys and troubles of the day, seeking affection and assistance with it all.

It gets even worse when you add a home-based business into the mix. You've now added pressure to run a business and consistently create income. Things that normally involve more than one person or department.

[su_list icon="icon: hand-o-right" icon_color="#ff1493"]

• A/R and Billing
  You won't get very far if you can't manage your accounts receivable and accounts payable. An accountant can help you set your system up but you do need to know how to use it and how to read your reports. After all, overdue accounts won't collect themselves.


• Content/Product/Service Development
  Without a product or service to sell, you won't make any money.


• Customer Service
  Happy customers mean repeat business, referrals, and income.


• Human Resources
  The business may be too small to offer a benefits package but you do need to know when you can take time off and how much you actually get paid. Your accountant can help you determine how much tax and other deductions you should pay but it is up to you to stay on top of that.


• Marketing and Advertising
  You need to let potential clients know you exist and help craft the impression they have of you and what you do.


• Technical Support
  Tech helpers can become tech nightmares when gadgets stop working like they should and software starts glitching, losing important data. It needs to be fixed quickly so that you and your clients can get back to work.


• Web Development
  Your website is a living business card. Until it goes down or gets hacked. All that content you worked so hard to create needs to uploaded and properly formatted. It needs to be updated and kept secure.

[/su_list]

Focus Is The Key

[su_pullquote]"It must be nice to stay home."
The stress and strain builds up every day with both sides may be thinking they are carrying the heavier load and could a better job than the other partner.[/su_pullquote]A traditionally employed parent's primary focus during work hours is the job they are paid to do. (Except for the times they are on social media like Facebook but that's an entirely different post.)

A stay-at-home parent's primary focus is the well-being of the children and upkeep of the home.

Meanwhile, most work-from-home business models force the work-from-home parent to choose between the kids and the home or the business. Often many times a day!

It can be hard emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. Downright frustrating and tear inducing on one day, absolutely a praiseworthy effort on another:

1. You've struggled with writer's block and are finally on a roll when the baby starts to cry.


2. You need to record a tutorial or lead a live teleseminar but the older kids are happily running around, chatting and laughing loudly.


3. You finally put out all those household fires - washed the dishes, got the laundry started, put the baby down for a nap - when the phone rings. It's a potential client but you still need to make sure the older kids eat a healthy lunch.

The bad news is that there isn't an easy, one-family-fits-all answer. It all comes down to what you and your partner have chosen to focus on and what both of you think "the work day is done" means for the work-at-home parent.

[signoff]

Unknown

Sometimes it sucks to think of how good what could have been looks compared to "what's meant to be". I think somehow it all turns out okay, we move on (what choice do we have?), and we find something else but every now and then ... there's that little twinge.

Why do things happen the way they do? If God gave us all free will, how can there be destiny, a "meant to be"? Why does it work out for someone else? Heavy questions I don't have an answer to and probably never will.

It's easy to talk about fate, destiny, and things being meant to be when we experience a positive, happy, and desirable outcome.

When hurtful things happen though, it can be hard to reconcile how a loving God would allow - even pre-ordain - our hurt. Does He seriously feel that we deserve to have a terrible thing happen to us?

If there is a plan for each of us, I don't think it is written in stone.

God gave us free will, which means we all have the opportunity to change what is/was planned for us. It also means we can directly and indirectly affect what happens to someone else.

It's that latter part that gets us into trouble more often than not because we usually can't see how our choices impact someone else until AFTER we've done or said whatever we did or said.

God does not hurt us on purpose or allow us to be hurt for no reason.

Like a good parent, it must pain Him to see how we behave sometimes but He knows He must let us all grow up, make our mistakes, and harness our free will to become independent individuals.

Sadly, that means that sometimes we will hurt someone or someone will hurt us. It's up to us to seek His comfort when we need it, to try to make amends with those we hurt when we make a mistake, and to strive to keep our hearts from growing hard. Easier said than done, I know.

All I can do - all I can tell you - is to just keep praying and believe that God will make things right somehow. That's what keeps me going when the hurts of my past come sucker punching me out of nowhere.

[signoff]

Unknown

Facebook page owners will soon be faced with another decrease in organic reach. Currently at around a frustrating 16%, that number is anticipated to drop down to a paltry 1-2%.

[su_note note_color="#feffc7" text_color="#000000"]Facebook Reportedly Slashing Organic Reach for Pages | AdWeek
Facebook is reportedly slashing organic reach for Pages, a move that could have a sweeping impact on brands that have spent big on the social platform as well as local companies that have worked hard with limited resources to develop often modest fan bases.[/su_note]

On the down side, in order for most companies to remain competitive, an increased ad budget will be required.

On the up side (depending on your side of the fence), it will be easier to gain page views by simply paying for them instead of deliberately creating the eye-catching content most of us have come to expect from the posts that we share.

Internet marketers who have relied primarily upon Facebook ads to get noticed will probably not notice much of a difference. Except perhaps as a ping in the pocketbook with increased competition over target audiences.

Facebook is a business and has a bottom line to consider. However, it is also a social media and networking channel with no to low cost competitors like Twitter, YouTube, and LinkedIn.

If you are a Facebook page owner, how will this affect you? Will you be taking your business elsewhere or hanging on for the ride?

[signoff]

Unknown

Good morning, my fabulous friends! Today is Thursday, March 20, 2014 (18 Adar II, 5774).

--- { Today's Psalms } ---
If you are following along on our Monthly Psalm Rotation Calendar, we'll be reading Chapters 88-89.

--- { Today's Empowering Thought } ---
"I trust God/the Universe to deliver my highest good in every situation."

Sometimes things look or feel so bad that we simply cannot imagine anything good coming out of them. Disasters, accidents, painful arguments, illness, aging - the list could go on and on.

Our sadness and depression could go on and on too, if we don't step in and take control of our thoughts and the emotions they inspire inside of us.

When you can't think of anything remotely qualifying as a Silver Lining Moment, practice this Month's Consciousness Exercise and then repeat to yourself that God (or the Universe, if you prefer) will always deliver your highest good in every situation.

Repeat it as many times as you need to. Meditate on it. Absorb it. Then seek out experiences that make you happy. Watch a silly movie, go to the closest comedy club or improv, spend time at the park with your dog.

Whatever it is - no matter how simple it may seem - if it works for you, do it.

--- { This Month's Consciousness Exercise } ---
Close your eyes and imagine you are blowing up a balloon with all the things that are bothering you. The things you worry about. The things that you aren't sure how to deal with. The things that bring you down emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and even physically.

Don't tie a knot on that balloon though. See yourself letting the balloon get almost full and then just letting it go. Imagine laughing at the crazy flight pattern that balloon is taking as it deflates and flies away from you.

Breathe. Feel the lightness. It will all work out. You will be okay. You are strong and have more control than you realize. Reclaim it.

[signoff]

Unknown

Good morning, my fabulous friends! Today is Wednesday, March 19, 2014 (17 Adar II, 5774).

--- { Today's Psalms } ---
If you are following along on our Monthly Psalm Rotation Calendar, we'll be reading Chapters 83-87.

--- { Today's Empowering Thought } ---
"Peace and happiness are a conscious choice."

We can choose to look for the Silver Lining Moment in every seemingly negative situation. We can choose to embrace the little things that make us smile and let go of the things that make us feel bad.

It's okay to honor our emotions by letting ourselves feel the sadness and pain. Just remember to let it go.

--- { This Month's Consciousness Exercise } ---
Close your eyes and imagine you are blowing up a balloon with all the things that are bothering you right now. The things you are worried about. The things that you aren't sure how to deal with. The things that bring you down emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and even physically.

Don't tie a knot on that balloon though. See yourself letting the balloon get almost full and then just letting it go. Imagine laughing at the crazy flight pattern that balloon is taking as it deflates and flies away from you.

Breathe. Feel the lightness. It will all work out. You will be okay. You are strong and have more control than you realize. Reclaim it.

[signoff]

Unknown

Faith is a tricky thing. It can be extremely frustrating - sometimes maybe downright depressing - to get an answer that is the complete opposite of what you are asking for. How do you reconcile your wants and wishes with the answer you get when that answer is nowhere near what you wanted?

Here you are, praying for deliverance or at least a bit of relief, working so hard to be the best person you can be, maybe even taking extreme efforts to "fix" a situation, but someone else just keeps getting away with being mean, insensitive, or downright hostile.

Why Lord?

 
Why are You keeping me here? Why won't you open another door or window for me? Why are You telling me to not give up but instead to pray for this person?

Does this mean He doesn't want to help or we somehow deserve what is happening? No! God is not mean. He doesn't torture us (even if it does sometimes feel like it!).



Growth is never easy and He will not make our road harder than it has to be BUT we do need to let go of what we think should happen. We need to let go of our expectations and surrender to what is and will be.

We need to live fully in the moment. Deliberately choosing to look for the Silver Lining Moment while letting go and letting God. That is the ultimate sign of our faith and reliance on Him.

[signoff]

Unknown

If a woman's feelings are hurt or she feels rejected enough times by her partner, she will begin to hold back parts of herself in an attempt at self-defense.

Among other ways, this can manifest itself as expending less effort on keeping the home tidy, seeming not to care about her appearance, or even not being as engaged with family events.

It's not material gifts that she seeks or an attempt to force her partner to put her first - she's smart enough to know she can't force someone to love her if she wants the relationship to be real and honest.

It's a gradual shutting down, a letting go, that only real interaction can cure. Small things, such as:

• Taking walks around the neighborhood together.
• Watching the sun set or looking up at the stars together.
• Holding hands and hugging for no reason.
• Sweet kisses as you pass each other in your home.

Actions, not things.

If you are concerned about finances, try a romantic date night in with candlelight, sparkling juice in wine glasses, a home cooked dinner on your best plates, and a slow massage or couple's bubble bath.

Keeping your relationship fresh, exciting, and loving is something that takes effort but will result in a long, mutually satisfying partnership that lasts a lifetime.

[signoff]

Unknown

[powerpress]

[su_quote]"A woman is like a tea bag - you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt[/su_quote]

Ahh, another truth. Although I don't think this applies just to women. Men and relationships can be held to this yardstick as well.

Truly, I didn't know how strong I was until I stopped to breathe and took a look back. Surprised the heck out of myself. I - like many of you - have survived a lot!

The thing that truly got me was realizing that - had I not gone through the things I had - I would never have known how strong I actually am.

[signoff]

Unknown

[powerpress]

If someone mocks you for your faith or for your "weak" nature, when you actually pray for self-control, peace, and the right response, remember Isaiah 66:5-6.

[su_quote]⁵Hear the word of the Lord, You who are concerned about His word! Your kinsmen who hate you, Who spurn you because of Me, are saying, "Let he Lord manifest His Presence, So that we may look upon your joy." But theirs shall be the shame.

⁶Hark, tumult from the city, Thunder from the Temple! It is the thunder of the Lord As He deals retribution to His foes.[/su_quote]

They make themselves His enemies by making light of your faith in Him. Do not lose hope but instead keep praying, keep believing, and - most of all - keep walking and living your faith.

God knows what He is doing and when He will do it. Our job is to simply keep living, looking for the Silver Lining Moment in every dark cloud, and focusing on the people/things/events that make and keep us happy.

[signoff]

Unknown

The key to becoming a successful conqueror is to always remember you are fabulous, gorgeous and capable of overcoming anything that opposes your will or desire while being mindful of the needs, desires and emotions of others.

When you start feeling down or unsure of yourself, think of something you are good at. Even better, think of something you either didn't know you could do or thought you couldn't do but did anyway.

What did it for me? My "by jove, I think I've got it!"? The thing that made me feel like I'm "the King Queen of the world!"? I made pancakes that earned a "million cazillion A+" from my son.

Before you scoff, let me assure you, that was no easy feat. You see, I'm the grown-up version of the girl who refused to follow the local decree that females should be inside, cooking, sewing and doing all the other "girl" stuff. I wanted to be outside, learning about the wilderness, working with the animals and all that. You know, having the kind of fun I saw the boys having.

Now that I'm an adult, I'm trying to learn those previously-abhorred "girly" things. I'm trying to be a true balabusta, successful parent and give my children the best environment I possibly can. Pancakes may be simple but overcoming my internal issues toward them and all they represent is an ongoing challenge.

If you are ready to begin your own world conquering campaign, I encourage you to find your empowering moment. Then seize it and milk it for all it's worth.

In time, you'll see that you've conquered the world (or at least, your little piece of it) by mastering yourself.

[signoff]

Unknown

[powerpress]

Every so often, I pull out an email I got from a friend a few years back. While I may not believe that it will bring me good luck as it claims to, I really believe in the message.

[su_quote]To realize the value of a sister/brother:
Ask someone who doesn't have one.

To realize the value of ten years:
Ask a newly divorced couple.

To realize the value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize the value of one year:
Ask a student who has failed a final exam.

To realize the value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a stillborn.

To realize the value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of one minute:
Ask a person who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize the value of one-second:
Ask a person who has survived an accident.

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.

You will treasure it even more when you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend or family member:
LOSE ONE.[/su_quote]

Remember to hold on tight to the ones you love!

[signoff]

Unknown

“Knowing others is perspective, but knowing one’s own self is enlightened; conquering others shows strength, but conquering one’s self shows true power.” ~ Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

True power doesn't come from conquering someone else, it comes from learning to conquer ourselves. Self-control. Self-discipline. Not railroading someone just because we can. Honoring someone's personal boundaries even when they themselves do not.

What does true power mean to you?

[signoff]

Unknown

"We are all inventors, each sailing out on a voyage of discovery, guided each by a private chart, of which there is no duplicate. The world is all gates, all opportunities." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Everywhere I turn, it seems someone is telling me I'm doing something wrong. That I need to conform. Homeschooling, extended travel, working from home, laughing "too much" - all things I should supposedly give up.

"Why can't you just be normal like everyone else?"

Because your path is not my path and my path is not your path. Because what is right for you may not be right for me. Because we were all given free will to choose and design our own 'destiny'.

Destiny and Luck are Roman deities of old. I do not bow down to either. Instead, I choose to live and let live. To create a life that is right for me and my little family. A life that will provide us with happiness, peace, great health, and success.

Choose your path and know that it's okay to be different. It's not always easy but trust me, you will respect yourself more and be happier for being true to who you are.

What do you do differently?

[signoff]

Unknown

Yes, I said it. My poop don't stink. Well, at least, I don't think anyone can smell it now. I gave in to the Facebook ads for Poopourri except I didn't want to pay that much just to see if it worked.

Lucky for me, I found a bottle of similar stuff at Dollar Tree for a dollar.

The coolest thing is this $1 wonder actually seems to work! All you have to do is squirt 2-3 drops in the bowl as soon as you know you've gotta go.

It supposedly creates some kind of oily film that traps odors underneath and tada! No stink!

Not sure what this does to the environment but I really like what it does to our indoor air quality!

Burning (Mooching) Bridges

You ever notice that you can help people and help people but when you need something, suddenly they are trying to make you feel sorry for them? As if it's your fault for being a burden even after you went out of your way for them (and they know it).

Why should my husband be punished and have to pay for other people's (including mine) stupidity?

He is not raising a fuss but I am. I'm here berating myself for having such a soft heart and saying how I really need to become a more hard-hearted person. Especially towards those with a history of emotionally manipulating me. I don't like the position I am in now and I've got no one to blame but myself. Even if I'm ranting about "them", it was my decision to help before, right?

Wishing you much peace, happiness, and success,

Unknown

Can you believe CJ is going to be 12 years old, 2 weeks (TWO WEEKS!), AFTER Skylar Marie is born? Her estimated due date is March 8th but she's a little bigger so maybe March 5th. Lordy, how did this happen?

Wait, don't answer that. I *know* how this happened but Lordy. I mean, just Lordy.

As if the age difference wasn't enough, my husband's two other kiddos are 14 and 10. So we'll have a 14 year old, a 12 year old, a 10 year old, and a brand new "Woops, we're pregnant!" munchkin!

Yes, woops.

The older child, 14 year old Aaron, asked in horror if we were going to tell Skyler she was woops. Yes, sir. Skylar will know she was a beautiful accident that we all look forward to having in our lives now that the initial OMG moments have died down a bit.

There are still the typical "what if I don't remember how to do this?!" freak-outs now and then but for the most part, we (mostly I) have settled into acceptance and making things joy-joy.

Okay, now that I've gotten that out of my system a little, I can talk about how proud I am of CJ and the work he has been doing on his website.

Don't get me wrong. I still do about half of everything and will probably have a presence there until he decides to kick me out but he's definitely taking on more and more of the responsibility.

CJ's Kids Club was initially intended to be a way for CJ to continue his speech therapy through podcasts and a social outreach of sorts to help him keep in contact with all the amazing people we were meeting on our travels. Then we discovered you could actually make money and get free stuff with it too. So he's taking it more seriously now.

The timing couldn't be better for me too. I will admit I was starting to feel overwhelmed and wondering if I needed to put CKC down. With the new baby coming, me trying to work, and juggling regular life stuff, I just didn't know if I could do it anymore.

Wishing you much peace, happiness, and success,

Unknown